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Sunday, March 15, 2015

Together in odds and evens

Destiny as everyone know has its own way of mending our way to meet two persons. What are you  doing now may lead to anything you could have imagined or not. Something it feels good to know that what is happening now, you wanted it to happen, sometimes you don't want and many times it happens for our good without our realisation.

 I found myself in the third situation where things used to happen for my good without my realisation in most of the cases. There are many examples but here I want to tell about how I found my life partner who always remains my side whether in I am in odd phase of life or in even phase.

The story starts with joining my first company. How I joined this company is itself a long story for myself. I have tried to sum up few of the links of past  how I reached my first company. [Click to know].

After joining the company and working with her about 6-7 months I realized that I am totally in love with her. It took further 2-3 months to get enough courage for getting myself ready for the proposal to a girl who had already became a close friend of mine. On a good day I decided to propose her and I got neither approval nor rejection. As that time I was only her one of close friend so it took little time for her to realise how much I love her. Here is the short story I wrote  how we got together.

As both of us know each other very well before starting of our relationship we liked this new togetherness very much. You can also find her part of story how we got together.

After one year after of our relationship we decided to make it official[Read: we wanted to get married in next one year]. Therefore I let my parents know my decision and she let her parents know her decision. Parents of ours didn't approve at the very first moment. But none of us stopped trying to convince them.

I told my parents that you should meet her before reaching any decision. Therefore I planned a very few phone calls before meeting in person. My mom liked her voice as well as well way of her talking and manner. So I won half of the battle over the phone only :). My mom convinced my dad to go with my decision and meet her face to face. Before meeting her I would say they were convinced only 75%(Although they didn't let me know this fact). But after meeting her I could read satisfaction over their faces. So this was part of my story how I convinced my parents. Let's move to her side now.

In India all of the burden of reputation is on Girl's side. Whether its her character, looking , cooking , walking . Everything about a girl is connected to reputation of girl's parent. If she has a boyfriend -parents to be blamed, if she is partying - parents to be blamed. Anything wrong she ever does parents to be blamed whether before marriage or after marriage as if girls are robot who are being controlled by their parents only and they don't have mind of their own.

I knew convincing her parents will be very tough due to social pressure of so called reputation in society. Her parents told her two major reason for the denial

  • I don't belong to their caste(or I belong to lower caste)
  • I don't have any house or property in NCR.
The first point surely comes in every parents mind due to our social structure built upon caste system. And reputation of one's parent get lower if they don't marry their children inside the caste. I was able to understand their situation but I can't correct it till date as I can neither change my caste nor theirs.

Therefore, we decided to hunt for a property as we know sooner or later we have to do this so why not now. For this point I am with her father's side as any girl's father will ask a stability for her after marriage. He doesn't want her daughter to suffer as tenant. 

We searched every site available whether offline or online. It took our several weekends running around various property dealer and construction sites to get our flat. As far I could read her face she was more serious than me in search of our new flat. 

One day she called me and told me she had found a good flat in budget and in commutable area from . She gave me number of the dealer and deal was done within few days. Then came the difficulty of arrangement of money for the flat as I didn't have much so that bank could give me loan. In this difficult phase we can see who are with us. I could manage to pay for flat with the help of her and  my parents. She gave more than 50% of booking amount , I managed 30% and 20% of amount was provided by my father. So now we #together are proud owner of our flat and looking forward to house warming very soon as soon as construction gets completed. 

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