1. 7 chtai pe 7 sadhu bethe the, 1 aadmi ne sbse bde sadhu se pucha, baba ldkiya line ni deti kya kru, bda sadhu chhote sadhu se, ek chtai or lga bhai k liye...
2. 3 Beautiful Quotes:
1~Deepest feelng is always felt in Silence
2~There is no true Luv widout Jealousy
3~A Lost Thng is always valued d Most..
3. HUSBAND-
Chalo, tumse Shaadi karke mujhe ek to Fayda hua.
WIFE-
Koun sa Fayda?
HUSBAND-Mujhe mere Gunaho ki saza jeete-jee hi mil gayi..
4. A
A
A
A
A
AA A A A A AA
AAA A A A AA
A
A
A
A
Aa
Aaa
Aaaa
Aaakchii.!
Sory
mausam hi aisa hai.
5. "Pyaar hua ikrar hua h,pyaar se phir Q darta h dil..."
Q na dare dil?...
Q ki-A@j kal k pyaar se badhta h sirf mobile or Restaurant ka bill.
So don't love.
6. FATHER:Tmhari mummy ne mera dil tod diya islye m sharab p rha hu..
SON(U.K.G ): MUMMY ne mera scale b tod diya..
"mere liye b ek GLASS lagao papa.
7. Butter Chicken Banane ke liye aapko chahiye
Chicken - 1 KG
Tamatar- 5 piece
Masala - 1 Packet
Namak - Swad Anusar
Pyaz - Aukaat Anusaar..
8. Banta: What's the similarity between Marriage and 11:59pm? Santa: Dono k baad 12-bajte hain aur din badal jate hain.
9. O waqt bda acha c, jdo main nikka bcha c, Goliyan-tofian khanda c, chotiyan nikkran paunda c, Odo sasta bda petrol c, par cycle mere kol c, Na kudiyan da koi zikr c, menu padai di bs fikr c, Na fcbuk te status likhda c, ms-word te paint sikhda c, Jdo yar saare mere nal c, odo waqt ne badli chal c, school chad aaye colg vich, kyuki zindgi da swal c, Hun group ch rehna painda hai, sorry, thank-u kehna painda hai, par fer v yar mere puchde ne, tu kalla-kalla kyu rehnda hai, Main jwab nhe de paunda ha, bs chup-chap reh janda ha, fir hanju poonj ke kehnda ha, tusi saare jao main aaunda ha, Sb puchde wajah dil sakht di, main keha yad aagyi us waqt di, jo waqt bda acha c, jdo main nikka bcha c.....
10. Nice line said by a broken heart.....
Please don't come one more time infront of me! Otherwise once again i'll trust u......
11. Line by true lover:
"Y i always hav tym frm my bsy schedule for that person bt that person dnt hav. My heart says bcz u luv truely bt that person dn't."
12. A Person Wid Pure Heart Carries A Wonderful SMILE Dat Mks Evn His Enemy Feel Himself Guilty 4 Being An Enemy.So Capture D World Wid Smile....
13. Sum people r more dearer than others,
d reason is not d happiness u feel when u meet dem bt it is d emptiness u feel wen they r not around....
14. "Its not your mistake if u cant read the eyes that cheat u"
but
"Its really your mistake if u cant read the eyes that love u".
15. D beautiful sentence:- "Talk With Someone Who Makes u Happy, But Talk More With Someone Who Can't Be Happy Without you...!!! Feel D Difference....:)
16. Truth of lyf-
"The best thng in life is finding sum1 who knows all ur mistakes & weaknesses n still thinks u're complete n You're special.!"
17. F@bul0us qu0te:
"U r the 1 who can handle ur HEART better Dan any1 else...:-)
So don't give it to sm1 else nd complain tht dey r hurting it...!!!":-/
18. SuMdAy evRythiN wiL mke perfect SENSE.
So 4 now, LaUGh at da coNfuSion, sMile thru D tears & keep remindin uRslf dat EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A REASON.!
19. Bacha maa se : mom ye pregnant kya hota hai?
mom ne gusse se dekha to wo samjha k gusse ko pregnant kehte hain...
2nd day bacha school se aate huye ek padki k upar gir gaya ladki ki maa : chila kar boli ye kya batameezi hai ?
Bacha bola : gira teri beti k upar hu or pregnant tu ho rahi hai:
20. Biwi neend me zorse chillai-Jaldi utho,mere PATI Aa gaye
SANTA utha,khidki se kud gaya,Tang tut gayi
Fir khyal Aaya saIa me hi to uska pati hu
21. A Beautiful GIRL puts her finger on HOTEL MANAGER'S lips.
MANAGER kisses each finger.
.
.
GIRL:Tell Ur BOSS there is no Soap in Ur LATRIN...
22. My number has changed
new no. is
100
Plz call me,
Agar mera naukar uthaye to 2-4 galiya de dena.
Bada kamina hai,
apne ap ko police batata Hai..
!s!
23. Ladka : Meri us jagah hath lagao jaha haddi na ho
Ladki muskrate hue : Chal phir nikaal bahar pakdu
teri Zubaan ko
Moral:
Mere sab msg gande nahi hote!
24. Wedding is the only day when a boy stand on a stage
& watch other girls dressed beautifully
& think,
"Yeh sab aaj se pehle kahan marr gayi thi..??" ;-)
25. Sachin's statemnt aftr match wid SA
"I was stil only changing my sweaty cloths n taking a shower
n ws shockd 2 c d whole team back in d dressng room showring too"
26. 1 Hathi swiming pooll me gira to sab chitiya bahar nikal gai.
1 chiti hathi k pith pr chad gai, to dusri boli-"DUBA SAALE KO DUBA, LADKIYO KO CHEDTA HAI"......
27. Jidhar dekho ishq k bimar baithe
h
Hajaro mr gaye lakho taiyar
baithe h
Barbaad hote h sale ladkiyo k
piche
or kehte h hm berojgar baithe h.
28. RAJU, FARHAN & RANCHO
scooty pe ghumne gaye...
Achanak RANCHO ud gaya...
Q?
?
?
Qk
BEHTI HAWA SA THA WO...
UDTI PATANG SA THA WO...
Ab Msg Padna Band Kro aur...
KAHA GAYA USE DHUNDO..!!
:-)
29. Tears r more spcl thn smyl bcj smyl cn b gvn 2 anyone bt tears shed only 4 dose whom v truely love.
Undrstnd...???
30. Studnt- Sir sb log HINDI, ENGLISH me bolte h MATHS me kyo nhi bolte?
Tchr- Jyada 3, 5 na kr 9 2 11 ho le Nhi to 4, 5 de dunga to 32 k 32 hilne lagenge.
32. Dard-E-Dil Dekho Kitne Gham Jhele H,
Unko Kya Pata Dil Me Zakhmo Ke Mele H,
Unki Mehfil Ki Khawahish Thi Muje,
Dekho Zindagi Me Aaj Hum Kitne Akele H.
33. Shah Jahan Ne Taj Mahal Ki Har Deewar,Har Meenar,Har Kaleen Ko Dekha,Har Khidki Se Dekha.Aur Bola.Maa Kasam,Bahut Kharcha Ho Gaya
34. Kabhi Kisi Se Pyar Nahi Karna,
Kabhi Kisi Ka Aitabar Nahi Karna,
Jinki Aadat Ho Vaade Bhula Dene Ki,
Unka Kisi Mod Par Intezar Nahi Karna.
35. 1 Sardar ko exam me koi sawal nahi aata tha to sardar ne hr swal ke jawab me llllllllllllllllll lines laga di or likha.
scratch krke answer padh lo..
36. Tees mar khan - Flop film...
Dabang - Hit film...
Moral:Ladki jawan hone se kuch nahi hota, Badnam honi chahiye..;-)
37. Ladki Saath ho to
HOTEL BILL
Ladki Door Ho to
PHONE BILL
aur
Ladki Door Hi Ho Jaye to
BAR BILL
Isliye Ladkio Se Bachke Rehna
37. Kisi Mahapurush ne Kaha h ki- Ladkiyo ki Aadhi Zindagi Husband Ki Talaash me, AUR Baaki Aadhi Husband Ki Talaashi me Gujar jati h.
38. LADKI or SMS me kya Similarity Hai....?
?
?
?
?
?
?
?
?
?
?
?
?
?
?
?
?
?
?
?
?
?
?
Jab Tak UPER Se NEECHE Tak Pura DEKH Na Lo CHAIN Hi Nahi Aata..
39. Khuda kare tera mobile kho jaye.Mile mujhe, mera ho jaye. Karu SMS ladkion ko naam tra aye. Maar tujhe pade aur kaleja mra thanda ho j
40. Boy:Bus, Train or ladki ek jaise hi hote hai, 1 jati hai to dusri aa jati hai.... Girl:Riksha, Taxi or ladke ek jaise hote hai, 1 bulao to 4 chale aate hai.
41. Ladkiyan ek dusre ko gift deti h perfume ,ear rings, suits,flowers ,chocolate !!aur ladke? ? ?"Ye le ladki ka no. Bs Mera nam nhi ana chaiye.
42. 1 ladki sadak pe akeli ja rahi thi piche se 1 ladke ne kaha ghar tak lift chahiye kya?
Grl: Bhag ja sale 3 din se lift le rahi hu abhi tak ghar nhi pahunchi..!
43. Jab Jb hume pyaas lagti hai, Unke aane ki aas lgti hai unki dewangi mein hum ho gaye itne dewane, Ki har ladki ki maa apni saas lgti hi ,
44. Lo ji Ladkiyon ne abhi se Rona Dhona Shuru Kar Diya Hai,
Kehti hain,
Valentine Manaenge to Sirf "Your name" k saath Warna ye Din hi khatam karo...:-(
45. Dil ko tab bahut jhatka Lga-jab Mandir me 1 ladke ko cigrate pite dekha
Ghor kalyug
u cant belive mere to hath se
Daru ki botal hi gir gayi..
46. 1Girl: Muje to Aisa Ladka chahiye Jo Smart. Khubsurat. Decent. Shareef. mast. Nek Ho.2ndGirl :chup kar Kameeni "ur name" Sirf Mera Hai...:-
47. The night is dark,the moon is high,i stop my car,u ask why I come close 2 U,U feel shy,i tell u those 3 words.Oh God Puncture
48. Macchar ne kata, dil me junoon tha.Khujli hui itni, dl be sukoon tha. Pakada 2 chod diya soch kar ki, sale ki ragon me apna hi khoon tha
49. I mix RUM in water and got drunk. I mix WHISKY in water and got drunk again.Now I have decided never to drink water again!!
50. Pls remind me 2 rmnd U 2 send U this reminder that reminds me of reminding U tht U never have 2 rmnd me 2 remember U, I ALWAYS DO!
51. Last nite I lay in bed,looking the stars,the beautiful sky endless horizon.and suddenly I thought.where the hell is my roof,
52. Intlgent ManIntlgent WomanRomance.Intlgent ManStupid WomanPregnancy.Stupid ManIntlgent WomanAffair.Stupid ManStupid WomanMarriage
53. What R the 3 fastest ways of Communication Telephone,Television,Tellawoman.U still want faster.tell her not 2 tell anyone,
54. If ur world is spining Round Round.Round.Ur heart is beating fast,do u think its LOVE na Munna na its called high BP
55. jawani ke din chamkile ho gaye, aur husn ke tewar nukile ho gaye hum izhaar karne me thode dhiile ho g, ar unke haath peele ho ge
56. Arz kya hai:Bahaar aane se pehle fiza aa gayi,ki bahaar aane se pahle fiza aa gayi,aur phool khilne se pahle.bakri kha gayi.
57. Jise dil diya woh dilli gayi, jse pyaar kiya wh Italy gayi. Khudkhushi karne chala, Zalim bijali ko haath lagaya, Bjli hi chali g
58. Doctor says 2 pathan: Appka aur aapki biwi ka blood group ek hi hai? Pathan: Hoga zaror hoga; 25 saal se amara koon peeta aay..!
59. 1 Cigrte apki zndgi k 5 min kam kr dti h,
or 1 Smile apki zndgi k 10min bda dti h.
Moral: Haste-Haste Cigrate pite rho
To b 5min ka fyda hga
Wht n idea srji
60. Height of "oohh shit..."
A boy throws a luv letter to a gal bt it falls on her brother..............
and her brother agreed
B-)B-)B-)B-)
61. A Girl's Poem:
I'm fed up of guys
they all lie,
They break our hearts n make us cry
Loving a guy is such a sin..
.
.
Hey check out d guy who jus walkd in.;-)
62. Nowadays God is in Dabang mood...
"Hum tumhari city me aisa climate create karenge
ki confuse ho jaoge...
k
raincoat pahene ya sweater.."
;-)
63. MD was walking in the factory, he noticed a guy leaning against the wall, looking somewhere..
He approched the man & asked him, "How much do you earn??"
The guy was amazed n said, "2000, sir."
MD took out wallet n gave the guy 6000 n told him,
"I pay people here 2 work n not 2 waste time..This is your 3 month's salary n now get out of here NEVER come back..."
He just disappeard.
The MD now looked at other workers & asked, "Who was that guy??"
Workers replied, "He was the pizza delivery guy sir..."
.
MORAL: ghana chaudhry b na banana chahiye..;-)
64. Earlier-
"NEKI KAR, DARIYA ME DAAL.."
But Now-
"KUCH BHI KAR,
FACEBOOK PAR DAAL...."C=C=
65. Faqir:Bahenji Bhuka Hu,
Khuda K Nam P Khana De Do...
Bahenji:Khana Abi Ni Pka
Faqir: FaceBook Pe BABA 'Pappu' K Nam Se H
Pak Jae
To Wall Pe Update Kar Dena...
66. U need 3 things in ur life:
Love- To make u weak...
Alcohol- To make u feel strong...
FRIENDS- To pick u up when both of d above make u hit d floor...
67. 1 Pinjre mein kuch tote ek maina ko chhed rahe the...
pas me dusre pinjre me ek Tota puja kar raha tha aur
dusra tota Namaz padh raha tha...
Maalik ne socha-
"kitne nek tote hain,
inke pinjre me maina safe rahegi..."
Usne maina ko unke pinjre me daal diya...
Jab maina us pinjre me gayi
to puja karne wala tota Namaz padhne wale tote se bola...
"UTHO KHAN SAHAB DUA QUBOOL HO GAYI"...
Apni Item aa gyi h..."
68. A naughty quote:
the only loss which gives a sense of achievement is..
.
.
'Virginity'!!!
69. 3 Kinds of Men
ASIAN-Has Wife & GF
bt Luvs Wife d Most
AMERICAN-Has Wife & GF
bUt Luvs GF d Most
ARAB-Has 14 Wives,
9 GFs
& 6 BFs
but Luvs his CAMEL d most:-D
70. Shaeyri by boyz
Arz kiya hai-
Khuda bachaye hume in hasino se,
Khuda bachaye hume in hasino se,
Lekin in hasino ko kaun bachayega hum KAMINO Se...:-D
71. Maths tells us 3 tragic love stories-
Tangent lines who had one chance to meet and then parted forever...
Parallel lines who were never meant to meet... And
asymptotes who can get closer and closer
but will never be together...
tc.
72.
Wat is d differnce between falling from
tall & short buildings.
Frm tall:
Aaaaaaaaaaaa... ;-)Dhappp..:-P
Frm Short:
dhappp... ;-)aaaaaaaaaa:-P
73. Tshirt no - 10 Age 37=3+7=10
height 5.5=5+5=10
WC win date 2/4/2011= 2+4+2+0+1+1=10
World Cup after 28 yrs=2+8=10
Strike rate in WC 91=9+1=10 Its Truly 10DULKAR
74. Ek bar 1dukan pe-
Popat-pen hai pen?
Dukndr-nahi
2 min baad..
Popat-pen h pen? DKNDR(gusse me)- NAHI
POPAT thodi der me wapas ata h-pen hai pen?
DUKNDR- Nahi,aur ab waps aaya to hathoda maruga tere sar pe...
popat kuch der me fir wapis aya..
POPAT-hathoda hai ??
Dukndr-nahi
Popat-TO Fir Pen hai pen..?
75. Agar Apko Is Baat Ka Afsos Hai
K Apka Intzar Koi Nai Krta
To 1 Kaam Kre
2Ghante Toilet Me Beth Jaye
Koi Na Koi Bahar Apka Intezar Zarur Krega:-);-)
76. Bachelors think dat
Married man r lucky
Married think dt Bachelors r lucky
none is wrong
bt
D point is
Bachelors think at night
&
Married think at day time...
77. Soon Weddings will be like this.. !!
Priest: Do you agree to change your FACEBOOK status from *single* to
*married*??
Boy: Yes! I Login.
Girl: Yes! I Login too.
Priest: Congratz.. You are now husband and wife..
You may now POKE the bride..
And don't forget to TAG me in the wedding pics..!! :-):-):-)
78. Boy to god- give me A beautiful girl.....
God- If you are Muslim
then I'll give you Katrina,
if Hindu
Kareena,
if Christian
Angelina...
..
Whats ur name??
Boy: Abdul Vinod Fernandes...;)
God:
Give him Dolly Bindra...
ssala over smart ban raha h...!!:O
79. Dhritarashtra : Main bahut khush hu PRIYE, tumne mujhe tarah tarah ke 100 PUTRA diye.!
Gandhari : Ye sambhav hi na hota SWAMI,
AGAR AAP ANDHE NA HOTE..!!
80. Teacher: Bachon aaj hum ek vachan aur anek vachan sikhenge.
T: Ek aurat ek khidki se jhaank kar dekh rahi hai.
Bachche: Ye ek vachan hua...
Teacher: Bahut si auraten bahut sari khidkiyon se jhaank kar dekh rahi hain.
Bachche: Ye to G.B ROAD hua...]
81. Two best Lines :-
Luv ur Luv so much dat u dont need to ask,
"Wid whom were You?"
&
Trust ur frnd so much dat u dont hav to saY,
"Dont teL dis to any 1'':-)
82. 1 machhar tufan me tha
raste me 1bada ped mila
usse lipat gaya
jb tufan chala gya
to machar pasina pochte hue bola-agar aaj mai ni hota to ye ped gir hi jata..
83. What is the most popular word that begins with "F" and ends with "K"? .
.
.
.
.
Its FacebooK..!;)
The word you thought is the second most popular. .!!;)
84. Chota sa magar bahut important message
''Pyaar"
"Dil" Me Hona Chahiye,
"Lafzon" Me Nahi..."
Aur
"Naraazgi"
"Lafzon" Me Honi Chahiye,
"Dil" Me Nahi.
85.
Teacher ne 1 cote bache se pucha tumhare papa ka nam kya hai ?
Child-abhi nam nhi rakha hai.Pyar se papa papa kehta hu
>
86. DIARY OF A BABY
15Jun:- I get attached with ovary.
17Jun:- I m tissue now.
30Jun:- Mujhe MAA se khana mila.
15Jul:- Maa Papa se boli "wo papa banenge" MOM-DAD r very HAPPY.
15Sep:- Mera DIL JOR-JOR se DHADAK raha hai.
14Oct:- I hv little hands, legs, head n stomach.
13Nov:- Today i ws in a ultrascan. Wow! I m a girl.
14Nov:- oops! My mom n dad killed me..
My only crime was tht i was a girl WHY?
If ur human..
PASS IT ON Save Girl Child.
87.A Baniya having no child , no money, no home and a blind mother, prays to God...
God happy with his prayers, grants him only one wish!
Baniya : I want my Mother to see my Wife putting diamond bangels on my child's hands in our new house...
GOD: DAMN; I Still have alot to learn from these baniyas
88. Bhehar ki gali main paan ki dukan, Devdas ne dekhi Paro Ki muskan, Dvds ne khilaya pro ko paan, Khake pn Pro bolo'Shukriya Bhai Jan
89. Meri taref se apko 1 PAPPI Aapki saheli ko 1 PAPPI Saheli ki saheli ko 1 PAPPI.Aaj hi mere DOGI ne 10 PAPPI ko janam diya hai
90. Dil k dard zuba par laate nahi, Hum aankhon se ansu bahate nh, Zakham chahe kitna hi gahre kyo na ho, hm DETTOL k siva kuch laagate nahi ,
91. Gud looks catch eyes,Gud Personality catches heart,U R blessed w both.FLATTERED.Dont Be,it was sent 2 me,I wanted U 2 read it
92. Tusi bade gr8 ho,rsgule di pl8 ho,ande da oml8 ho,sms krne me bde la8 ho,jlebi di tra str8 ho.Par jo bhi ho,tusi mere fav8 ho
93. This cat,is cat,good cat,way cat,2 cat,keep cat,idiot cat,busy cat,4 cat,20 cat,sec cat.Now read it without the word cat
94. Intlgent ManIntlgent WomanRomance.Intlgent ManStupid WomanPregnancy.Stupid ManIntlgent WomanAffair.Stupid ManStupid WomanMarriage
95. UR network tariff has changed.Call charges R now calculated according 2 brain size.The smaller the cheaper.You can make free calls,
96. The night is dark,the moon is high,i stop my car,u ask why I come close 2 U,U feel shy,i tell u those 3 words.Oh God Puncture
97. Kya bindaas hawa chal rahi hai,bird gana ga rhi hai,cow grass eat rhi hai,shane sms kar rahele hain aur dhakkan sms padh rhle hain!!
98. Every mor ur 1st thing that comes 2 my mind.I wish I cud start day w/ U in my bed.I luv ur feel 2 my lips.U make my day. I love U NESCAFE
99. U r d 1 whos so smart,U r d 1 whos so charming, U r the 1 whose so good looking. And, I'm the 1 who is spreading these rumors
100. A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U.Z 1 who invented alphabets was genius,but he made silly mistake by keeping U I so far
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